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Friday 23 December 2011

Carra Loves The End

Look who has opened his present early - The Legendary Jamie Carragher, reading The End in Twentymans barbers In Waterloo! (he's pissing himself laughing......on the inside)

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You are gonna have to hurry if you want to get your End for Christmas. This is likely to be the last print run and the book is flying out. I have just had word that Waterstones in Liverpool One has sold out. Here is alist of shops seling the book and you can still order online via http://www.sabotagetimes.com/life/the-end-the-fanzine-that-was-the-voice-of-1980s-liverpool/

Waterstones: Liverpool Bold St, Ormskirk, Chester, Birkenhead Southport and “Liverpool 1”
HMV: Liverpool South Street, London Oxford Circus
News From Nowhere, Liverpool Bold street
Pritchards, Crosby
Hat, Scarf or Badge, Liverpool
Fat Buddha, Glasgow
Ran, Bold St Liverpool
Hairy Records, Liverpool, Bold street
Jumbo Records, Leeds
Oi Polloi, Manchester
Garbstore, London
Sister Ray, London
Superdenim, York

Thursday 22 December 2011

http://news.qthemusic.com/2011/12/guest_column_-_it_looks_like_w.html



Article in Q (online magazine) about THE END Book

The End Book- Tops December Best selling list




Waterstones have confirmed that The End Book is the best selling book in Liverpool in the build up to Christmas 2011 (Beating Jamie Oliver into 2nd Place)




Thank you to everyone for buying it. Its made us very rich

Wednesday 21 December 2011

End Intro- Phil Jones. Unedited version



The Curse of The END

The End started around 1981, I’d met Peter Hooton a few times through mutual, like minded friends. The 1st time I met him was at a legendary mini bus excursion into Manchester, where a mini mob of us were attempting to geg into a Jam gig at the Manchester Apollo (A couple of us met Paul Weller a few days earlier at a Liverpool gig and he said he’d get us in through the stage door if we turned up at Manchester. So of course about 20 of us squeezed into a mini bus and set off. Weller took one look at us and shot into the stage door before we’d shouted, “oi! Well….”
I’ve never forgiven the cunt. What followed that evening was intended to be written and published in a Mod fanzine I was writing at the time with (ex deputy lord Mayor of Liverpool), Steven Rotherham. “Time for Action” However I was soon to be accosted by smooth Talking, man about town, Peter Hooton at one of his orgy like house parties. With drink, and women, he seduced this vulnerable young man and talked me into packing in my thriving Mod Fanzine adventure and to join a joint adventure… a fanzine with a new focus, a never before seen Local worldview, based around Music (good music like, no shite!) Football, gigs, local pubs and clubs, and the new scallie fashion (not “casual”) / terrace culture.

I succumbed. I shelved “Time For Action” (preventing the manuscript from the night at the Apollo shenanigans ever seeing the light of day) and THE END was born

I was more interested in the music and the footy and so combined being a co-editor, with doing Album, singles, local Demo tape reviews and Introductions, as well as contributing to various things like the In’s & Outs, fake letters, blag Poems, and personal ads etc. I also did a large proportion of the layouts by hand!. (In those days “cutting and pasting” was done with a scalpel and spray glue. It was a fuckin arduous task).

The things that made The End both unique and popular (more popular than all its then contempories like “Breakout” and “Merseysound”) were the fictitious characters like “Joe Wag”, “Dosser”, “Billy no mates” etc…. In Peter Hooton, Mick Potter and Kevin Sampson The End had stumbled upon some of the most cutting, funny cynical writers of that time.

So, getting talked out of writing my little mod fanzine and joining The End proved to be a brilliant success!
err….well, not in a business sense, like. We basically covered the cost of the printing and spent any (very minor) profits on regular staff benders. The staff grew to include John Potter, Tony McClelland and Paul Need. We also discovered a great match day ritual of selling the fanzine inside the pubs around Anfield and Goodison on a weekly basis..(Well, I say weekly basis, The End wasn’t exactly punctual. I think one time we only got round to producing one edition in the whole year). Selling The End in the pubs around Anfield and Goodison on match days paid our entry fee to the match and then the post match benders.

So to the curse of The End.well there were obvious ones right from the off. In the first edition, The lad who designed our 1st ever front cover committed suicide. We reviewed The Specials..within weeks they split….the same fate befell almost everyone we cared to big up…and always within weeks. The Undertones, Madness, The Beat, The Clash!! It got quite eerie! We Interviewed Alexei Sayle at the height of his fame…and within weeks he became SHITE and has been on obnoxious cunt ever since (“Great bus journeys of our time”? where did yer get that one Alexi’?) However, The Curse could also be sneaky…. my biggest disappointment was that, despite reviewing “U2” they stayed together and went on to rule the world and all religions.

We then became the focus of local media and police attention (our phones were tapped) after the Hysel disaster and a CS gas attack on Ron Atkinson’s then Manchester United team.

Also, I would point out that when I began writing the End, I was in a relationship, I was thin, I had a memory that actually worked, I had hair, and I was drug free. Oh, how that changed over the next decade! Damn that curse!

Of course, it wasn’t all bad news. One of the highlights of being co-editor of the End was getting to interview and meet a lot of our heroes. Meeting John Peel and developing a friendship with him was a one of the highlights of my life. I had been writing to John Peel via his Radio 1 show from my days with “Time For Action”. He’d always announce when a new edition (all two) was out. I carried on with the tradition and sent him every copy of The END from Issue one. But this time John took a real shine to the fanzine and really related to the humour and would promote The End constantly, to the point of wearing our naff tee shirts when he was hosting top of the pops.

We agreed to meet to do an interview with him (A fuckin candid and strikingly honest interview at that). At that first meeting. He got a bit merry and kept reminiscing about when he’d met me in Paris before the 1981 European Cup Final and told me tales of what we got up to and spoke about in Paris. .........problem was, I hadn’t even been in Paris!
He turned out to be such a lovely man. He More than lived up to his reputation and beyond. To me John Peel is synonymous with The End. He helped promote us and gave us national credibility.

Despite the ups and downs- I’ll always remember those times with great fondness and especially for the fact that writing the End allowed me to meet great people, like Madness, Alan Bleasdale, Simple Minds, Mick Jones, The Undertones.....(even Fish from marrillion!?) etc but most of all, John Peel.

I hope that anyone reading this collection remembers it fondly. Some of it may not have aged well, but I believe The End changed the way people wrote and spoke of things that hadn’t been spoken about before. But PLEASE don’t blame us for “chav”!

Love and peace....But no autographs


Phil Jones

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This is likely to be the last print run and the book is flying out. Here is a list of shops you can get the book from and you can still order online via http://www.sabotagetimes.com/life/the-end-the-fanzine-that-was-the-voice-of-1980s-liverpool/

Waterstones: Liverpool Bold St, Ormskirk, Chester, Birkenhead Southport and “Liverpool 1”
HMV: Liverpool South Street, London Oxford Circus
News From Nowhere, Liverpool Bold street
Pritchards, Crosby
Hat, Scarf or Badge, Liverpool
Fat Buddha, Glasgow
Ran, Bold St Liverpool
Hairy Records, Liverpool, Bold street
Jumbo Records, Leeds
Oi Polloi, Manchester
Garbstore, London
Sister Ray, London
Superdenim, York

END Book Signing- Waterstones Dec 22, 12pm-1pm



We will be signing copies of The END book in Waterstones (Liverpool One) between 12pm & 1pm today. This is the last chance to get your book signed (for your auld feller, judging by the number of "sign this for me dad" requests we got at the last signing). before Christmas


Thanks for all your support and for buying the book.

Monday 19 December 2011

Endies

"ENDies"




You've had the book.


You've had the Tee Shirt..


Now is the chance for you to get this years, must have Christmas Prezzie,


ENd Undies / ENDies!


one size fits all,


Bargain price $150


send your cheques to


End Mansions, 2666961, Beverley Hills





Friday 16 December 2011

End Book signing at Waterstones




Thank you to everyone who turned up for the END BOOK book signing at Waterstones, Bold Street Liverpool. It was a great success.




After the punters left we all signed a load of copies to be left in the store, so if you couldn't get down and you are still after a signed copy there's a load available instore from today, 16th December.

Tuesday 13 December 2011

The End Book for Christmas



You are gonna have to hurry if you want to get your End for Christmas. This is likely to be the last print run and the book is flying out. Below is a list of shops you can get the book from. Don’t forget that The End staff will be doing a book signing in the Bold Street Waterstones on Thursday 15th from 5.30 and you can still order online via http://www.sabotagetimes.com/life/the-end-the-fanzine-that-was-the-voice-of-1980s-liverpool/









Waterstones: Liverpool Bold St, Ormskirk, Chester, Birkenhead Southport and “Liverpool 1”
HMV: Liverpool South Street, London Oxford Circus
News From Nowhere, Liverpool Bold street
Pritchards, Crosby
Hat, Scarf or Badge, Liverpool
Fat Buddha, Glasgow
Ran, Bold St Liverpool
Hairy Records, Liverpool, Bold street
Jumbo Records, Leeds
Oi Polloi, Manchester
Garbstore, London
Sister Ray, London
Superdenim, York

Justice tonight-

http://www.liverpoolfc.tv/video/features/10458-justice-tonight



Visit this link to watch a documentary about the JUSTICE TONIGHT tour

Monday 12 December 2011

Amsterdam- Home




Lovely new festive song from Mersey legends, Amsterdam

Friday 25 November 2011

End Book T-Shirts

We have a very limited amount of End Book tee shirts left over from the launch. They are £14.99 (plus £4.50 p&p UK. International P&P is £7.99 we have sizes ;- S, M, L XL and XXL). Paypal payments only- unless you are able to pick up direct in Liverpool- Inbox me on facebook (End Fanzine) for details if you are interested. or email fatskinwasthin@talktalk.net very limited so no guarentee that contact will reserve a tee. Only when payment received will the tee's be posted

Wednesday 23 November 2011

End Book- Liverpool Echo-Paddy Shennan comments- Nov 23




HINDSIGHT is a wonderful thing – and the passage of time can add enormous interest to what was said and written in years gone by.
Don’t just read interesting interviews with interesting people around the time they took place – wait a few decades and see how much better they are!
The publication of The End book – every issue of the groundbreaking 1980s fanzine edited by Peter Hooton, Phil Jones and Mick Potter – gives people the chance to do just that.
It wasn’t all about bad spelling and the chronic misuse of apostrophes – there were large helpings of humour and some fascinating interviews, which are even more fascinating all these years on.Read More http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/liverpool-news/columnist/2011/11/23/paddy-shennan-did-people-really-say-these-things-100252-29823383/#ixzz1eZ3ImB9b

Tuesday 22 November 2011

End Book Launch doppleganger

I have no idea who the handsome chap on the left is? but during the End Book launch he came over to me and said "are you Phil Jones"? .."yeah why"?....."ive been getting asked to sign the End book all night...everyone thinks i'm you".

Wednesday 16 November 2011

The End Book- Reviewed By Liverpool Confidential-Angie Sammons. November 16 2011



Fantasy Football League - Phoenix From The Flames - Eddie Cavanagh



Eddie Cavanagh (R.I.P) featured on Fanatasy Football league- Filmed on my stomping ground outside my old flats ("Heartbreak Hotel" - so called cos they were full of divorced fathers)

Sunday 13 November 2011

END BOOK Taster # 4. Hot dog man



The End Book is still available to order online now at http://www.sabotagetimes.com/football-sport/liverpool-and-everton-were-you-a-big-fan-of-the-end/ (details of costs and payment methods on the link) – those of you fortunate to live in Liverpool can now get a copy at Waterstones and “News From Nowhere”. (plus a limited amount in Southport Waterstones) Be warned stock is limited; we are rapidly selling out and it may not be reprinted.

Wednesday 9 November 2011

Taster # 3 Billy Bull (The End Book)

End Book – Taster #3 (the Return of Billy Bull)

The End Book is still available to order online now at http://www.sabotagetimes.com/football-sport/liverpool-and-everton-were-you-a-big-fan-of-the-end/ (details of costs and payment methods on the link) – those of you fortunate to live in Liverpool can now get a copy at Waterstones and “News From Nowhere”. (plus a limited amount in Southport Waterstones) Be warned stock is limited; we are rapidly selling out and may have to do another run in the very near future

Tuesday 8 November 2011

Joe Wagg- End Book Taster #2

End Book – Taster #2 JOE WAG

The End Book is still available to order online now at http://www.sabotagetimes.com/football-sport/liverpool-and-everton-were-you-a-big-fan-of-the-end/ (details of costs and payment methods on the link) – those of you fortunate to live in Liverpool can get a copy at “News From Nowhere”, “Hat Scarf and Badge shop” (limited amount). Alternatively – inbox me if you can get into town on a weekday and you want to pick one up direct from me. The Book will be available in “Waterstones” in the very near future

Friday 4 November 2011

End Book – Taster #1 The Mick Mills story

The End Book is still available to order online now at http://www.sabotagetimes.com/football-sport/liverpool-and-everton-were-you-a-big-fan-of-the-end/ (details of costs and payment methods on the link) – those of you fortunate to live in Liverpool can get a copy at “News From Nowhere”, “Hat Scarf and Badge shop” (limited amount). Alternatively – inbox me if you can get into town on a weekday and you want to pick one up direct from me. The Book will be available in “Waterstones” in the very near future

Monday 17 October 2011

Topflight show 117- "Buy THE END you minges"

Our favourite yank / anglo music show pays homage to The END and the upcoming End Book- hear Andy try to enighten Erik regarding some original 80's ins and outs- Plus music by The Specials, The Jam, The Sex Pistols, The Beat and Joe Jackson amogst others

follow this link, then click on Show 117 in the black box


http://topflightmfs.blogspot.com/

Monday 10 October 2011

The End Covers

http://www.sabotagetimes.com/football-sport/the-end-all-the-front-covers/

While you're waiting for the Book, sabotage times have released high quality images of every End cover released, check out the link here to view them or place an order for the book

Monday 26 September 2011

The End Book Is Finally here


It was the first terrace fanzine, the godfather of the football fanzines but still dressed in punk's cut and paste graphics. We're re-issuing them in one volume and there's a chance you can be in it.


Jesus this has taken a long time. 20 years in fact. If you’ve never seen The End now’s your chance to find out about a unique chapter in British publishing history. Long before casual was ever really recognised as a youth cult a group of Liverpudlians created a home-made fanzine capturing life on the streets of their city, the local music and political scenes, and not forgetting the terraces. It was very funny, very roughly laid out and very popular. Its greatest champion was John Peel who would regularly name check the magazine on his Radio One show and also invited the editors onto national television to discuss their cult fanzine.

Hardcore fans of The End have been badgering the former editors to bring out a best of for decades. Now Sabotage Times and adidas have come together to help them finally produce one volume with every issue in it. The book will include every Ins and Outs list, every music interview, every letters page, every one of the classic End illustrations but it can also feature you. For the next two weeks whilst we’re laying the final pages out and trying to get Peter Hooton’s essays about music and trainers down to a publishable length we’re giving you the opportunity to have your name or message in a special Friends of The End Page. All you have to do is be amongst the first purchasers of the book, which you can do by hitting the paypal button ‘Buy Now’ above this article on the Sabotagetimes website. Once you’ve paid send us your name or message to sabotage@sabotagetimes.com with THE END as the email’s subject.
In addition to all 20 issues there’ll also be a new Ins & Outs list, the memories of the three editors, and various other articles from contributors and admirers. This week we’ll be putting up a gallery of images from the magazine but this is the first opportunity to buy the book.
The book itself costs £20 plus £7.50 P&P for the 400 plus pages to come winging it’s way to you first class. The book will be published mid October and if you order now will be with you within the next 28 days.

Buy The End Book here http://www.sabotagetimes.com/football-sport/were-you-a-big-fan-of-the-end/

James Brown

Friday 16 September 2011

Shack - Streets of Kenny



Friday Tune............this should put you in the mood for the weekend

Thursday 18 August 2011

The Trestles. What Do You see





CD review; The Trestles. What do you see

The Trestles are, Alan o’hare, Tom Carroll, Howard Northover, Michael Tetlow, Ben Godfrey and Ian lewis. They happen to hail from Liverpool…its hard to imagine they could come from anywhere else.
Ive spoken to and corresponded with Alan o’hare in the past when he had a day job with our local rag, the Echo. He was very kind and very helpful.

For me, this puts me in an awkward position when opting to review a CD by his band of brothers. See I really struggle to be critical, in public about people I know. I'm happy to tell them face to face when something isn't to my taste, but to put my opinion in the ether as a guide whether people should purchase leaves me uneasy. Its why I didn’t pursue a career in music jounalism...that.. and that fact that i am a crap writer... Truth is, I’m just not ruthless enough to slag something off produced by people I like..and I’m too honest to praise something that I think is crap.

I’d only heard “sing on” a couple of times (on The End Blog, ironically) and was undecided. So what a relief it was when the first track burst into life and the opening line sneered, “I wanna drink of water from a mountain stream…….. I wanna policeman’s daughter to notice me “…..I just knew the next 45 minutes or so where going to be joyous.

The Trestles take you back to the days when bands had something to say that reflects the life and times around them. The sleeve notes give a nod of thanks and acknowledgement to Joe Strummer and Christy Moore amongst others and that sets the tone nicely. The album is chocker block with heartfelt anthems with fist pumping sing-along chorus’s. To to describe their sound as Pop or rock doesn’t cover it…I’m reminded at times of the past Liverpool twangs of Shack, Wylie, the La’s,... crossing over with Dylan and the Charlatans later American leanings (Hammond organ and all..and who can resist a bit of Hammond organ on a summers day?),. A heady mix for this humble narrator.


The Album opens up with the uplifting aforementioned “Drink of water”, which prepares you for the lyrical styling’s to come. The Folky acoustic guitar gives way to a fine old rocking tune,“I wanna hear the singer sing me a song. I want blood on my fingers to stain this guitar. I want Christy Moore to sing me to sleep. I want a bang on the door to bring me some peace” and it carries on in an inspiring pace. When I got to track 3, the aforementioned “Sing on”, I'd gained a new perspective of the song...Amongst its musical brothers the song now stood out and grabbed me by the throat. Beautifully arranged, the song starts with a great acoustic riff and vocals, it's a rousting sing along song about love and hate and the very struggles of life.. ..”let me tell you a little tale about a man about a man I met last night, singing on my favourite streets, looking for a fight. Not the type of fight you think I mean..no kicks no fists, no knives in sight, just a fight to save your heart and souls and send you home feeling alright”. It’s a perfect song for the summer of 2011 and has me perplexed as to why this city hasn't taken the Trestles to their hearts (yet) instead of the likes of fey, unwitty scouse wannabe’s like the Wombats.
The album is full of songs in similar vein. “The Civilised” takes a rockier route . "The Boy up North" takes it to slower acoustic lament while "Maggies Farm" ventures in that Americana sound, (stirring memories of the underrated Green on Red) whilst the lyric’s remain undoubtedly working class England. “Ghost of redundancy” is unerringly current..(the guitar in this reminds me of a track from Half man Half buisuit back in the DSS album) the words go, “All shut down again, its de ja vu again". We all, surely get that.
Other stand out tracks are “Everything I know” (you can imagine a lot of people choosing to turn this song when they lose their Fathers... An unashamed tribute to the writer’s auld feller.

“Thirty”, puts me in mind of an 80’s mod anthem (the Chords anyone?) about growing old and the closing track, “This House” is another out and out song about lost love.
There are no duff tracks.

For all its Gaelic verbal nods and occasional Americana What do you see manages to remain essentially English…northern English, at that, and thoroughly inspiring and entertaining. I love it


http://www.myspace.com/thetrestles
thetrestles@yahoo.co.uk

Wednesday 17 August 2011

e-petition

visit the link below. sign it, share it.

Full disclosure of all government documents relating to 1989 Hillsborough disaster
Responsible department: Home Office

Full government disclosure and publication of all documents, discussions and reports relating to the 1989 Hillsborough disater. *As requested by information commissioner Christopher Graham*


http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/2199

Friday 5 August 2011

shes alright by GAD


"She's alright" by GAD.
an old song from the 90's re recorded Jangly!

Thursday 28 July 2011

Cook Da Books - Livin For The City - The Chart Show - 1986

kevin radcliffe took over Da books for a short while

Wednesday 27 July 2011

Cook Da Books - Piggie In The Middle Eight

this was stopped by youtube...apparently they didnt appreciate people viewing it via The End Blog, and refused us to embed it.....fuck em...i'll upload a different cook da books song later

Saturday 23 July 2011

Deaf School/English Boys (With Guns)

"walkin down the streeta, with a heater, nothing could be neater"........................one of the most under appreciated of songs by the brilliant DEAF SCHOOL

Monday 11 July 2011

BILLY BRAGG - NEVER BUY THE SUN 090711.mp4

what a song from the great man. Genuinely brought a tear to my eye

Friday 8 July 2011

NEWS INTERNATIONAL by THE FARM

a song written and recorded by The Farm about Murdoch in the 1990's, set to images from the current debacle. Peter Hooton says on his facebook page "his empire has grown massively since I wrote the lyrics. Feel free to share. Murdoch must be stopped from taking over BSKYB"
Keep the pressure up. don't be fooled by the decision to defer until September ..keep the fire stoked.
Do I even have to mention that the notw is being replaced by the "sunday s*n"?....says it all really

Wednesday 6 July 2011

RUN TILL I DROP- GAD

Another new song from Gad. Run till I drop
(Gad goes all Stone Roses)

Wednesday 22 June 2011

Ins & Outs (June 2011)

Ins

Afternoon delight involving toothpaste
Toodle-fuckin-oo
Surprise facials
Rip roaring roast dinner farts
Hand painted skiddies
Titty nudges off yer mates ma
Getting a Brazilian on yer back (That long hairy spine thing!)
Getting a Brazilian to do your Brazilian 0’level language test for you
Using butter in yer tea when you run out of milk
corduroy socks
owls with great breasts
Curried rice crispy cakes
fighting the urge to wear a tie
nans with muzzies
telling your ex's mum you split with her daughter cos she was into water sports rummaging through Margret Thatcher
not giving a shit about ryan giggs business
Scouse in a giant yorkshire pudding
Still having yer lumberjack shirt that you bought from the London fashion fair in 1990
Wondering now, what to do..now you know this is the end
Telling yer kids to make their own fuckin roast dinner
Feeling better
Confusing an aubergine with Jack Charltons right testicle
Pork ribs
Pork pie hats
Giving yer nieces a number one skinhead cut when you are babysitting
Finding a goldfish in your funeral suit pocket
Cupping your neighbours moobs (from behind)
Fat blokes in skinny jeans
Snarling, miserable bastards
Scars from the Scarlet’s Bar
Polishing your pimples
Grinding your teeth ……with a pestle and mortar
Waxing your hamster
80’s casuals speedo’s

..................................................................................
Outs

Aspiring
Beerpricks
Smiley happy people
Hosni Mubarak
Skinny blokes in fat jeans
Timid plums
Liking Snoop
Bacon doughnuts
Crotchless gloves
wet dreams about Sue barker
wearing chicken kievs on yer ears in the winter
Greenburgs
3 pks of "thongs of the older man" for £1.99 in home and bargain
keeping a spare fishcake in yer sock in case the chippy is shut
sparrows with teeth
Smiling ass assassins
Not getting the “we’re not English, we’re scouse” thing
Soddomising Gary Numan
Expecting Happiness
Hobnobs on toast
Deciding you don’t have the time to take a shit
Good things
Black eyed Pete
Blonde haired, blue eyed lizards
Having a straightener with yer ma
Cleaning your arse on the living room carpet
Saying “who knew?”
Songs about hairy nipples
Denying piss stains on your kecks
Stuart Pearce
Ryvita vests
The End Book

Saturday 18 June 2011

Monday 13 June 2011

The END Bookhttp://www.facebook.com/theENDfanzine





THE END BOOK.


AT last we can finally promise that the entire collection of every edition of THE END will be released in one glorious warts and all book (The picture here is only an example of how it may look...what do youse reckon?)

The book will also feature some never before published photo's and memorabillia as well as introductions and memeories from the Likes of Kevin Sampson, James Brown, Paul Du Noyer, Peter Hooton and myself, Phil Jones.


You have been asking for this for decades (as well as thousands of requests for photocopies) It will be available to order in the next few months. We will keep you updated here and on the END FANZINE Facebook page.

The Trestles 'Sing On'

Wednesday 1 June 2011

GAD cover of the BEATLES , ONLY A NORTHERN SONG

not a great fan of cover versions, but this is brilliant- another great song from canny farm- "GAD"

gad- Only a Northern song- Beatles cover

not normally a big fan of cover versions....but loving this!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFY-3plZErs&feature=share

Tuesday 22 February 2011

Terracebint


Terracebint is an excellent on line fanzine for the football/ casual market written by mainly female writers.
They're looking to promote their readership and are also looking for new writers/ contributers .
Please take a look at their site, its well worth a read. The End even gets a sneaky nod

Saturday 5 February 2011

Ins

Fellatio
Vegetarian blackpudding
Telling your Boss they look good enough to beat
Confusing people by swapping the D & W on Wine and Dine signs
Licking the flame on yer lighter
Pricking a blister
Cleaning yer windows with oxtail soup
Arguing the toss
Selling your ears on e bay
Impersonating sprouts
Tattoo-ing yer ma’s arse
Sellotaping Pea’s to your eyebrows
Spitballs on the class ceiling
Digging your own grape
Discovering Lemon
Refusing to look up
Sunday Roast Farts
Father O’Reilly
Wearing a raincoat for bed
Blurts
Sausage flavoured tea
Marsh lane boot Boys
Walnut whip knobs
Unruly hares
Having a scrotum that resembles your Mrs.
Not giving two shits
Ringo’s starfish
Monobrow’s that encircle the entire head
Glaring at yer mates baby
Tea towels knitted from pubes
Staying in
Going out
Not realizing that you’ve just swallowed a rugby ball
Putting crushed peanuts under yer foreskin as a valentines surprise
Luis (and) Carroll

OUTS

Fellaini
Buying yer bird a Gary Neville thong for Valentines Day
Comforting rubs
Soggy Ciggies
Furrowed brows
Long lost undercrackers
Mumford & sons
Sleeping with the enema
asking, “do I got your word”?
Wearing yer Ma’s belly warmers on a night out (Fellers)
Blistering yer prick
Tossing the Aga
Buying second hand Derby County Players on E bay
Taking the credit
Being earnest on facebook
Match Nazi’s
Cute couples
Dressing up as Richard bacon
Shaving your egg before boiling it
Being Bi-sectarian
Asking for truffle
Smoking crushed Polo’s
Boiling a Lance
A sneaky Double Jack out of the Kitty money
Not knowing what Sexy Rexy is
Arsne
Genesis Corner
Becoming fatter than Fat Leo
Approaching
Smashing it
Jamie and Louise adverts
Pot holes on yer shirt
Bursting in
Having a machete nearby
Torres

Saturday 22 January 2011

Memories of Billy Bullshitters-Dave Heymans

For a while you used top run a item on bullshitters in The End . I never got around to sending this one in , but it was inspired by the item . It was about a tales of some of the bullshitters we know or used to know , there were some crackers in The End . But heres mine . I must stress that for confidentiality reasons , none of the names have been changed , and i still see all named parties from time to time .I was serving my time as an apprentice joiner @ Wimpey trainning college in Bridle Rd , Bootle , and me and my mate Ste were finding it hard trying to keep a straight face listening to this cunts lies all the time . But we didnt ever bother pulling him up because we used to like the buzz of trying to catch him out . Me and Ste used to have scooters at the time and the bullshitter had said he used to ride out with Cloud 9 scooter boys from over the water . Well we used to know that these were a bunch of twats from Birkenhead who used to rob you Mirrors , or any other fuckin thing off your Lammy , when you used to go to Len Turners scooter shop in Rock Ferry .One of us used to stay outside while the rest went in to ensure we wernt getting one of those Crosville buses home through the tunnel . Well we new that Barnsey was lying about this fictional friendship with the twats from the one eyed city . So over a sausage and egg on toast the plan was hatched . It was a monday morning and we were all saying what we got up to over the weekend . We told Barnsey that we had a ride over to New Brighton with the Cloud 9 and had the craic with them all . We discribed plenty of them , complete with type of scooter , pillion passenger etc . But by putting it into words does not do the tale full justice . There were tears rolling down are cheeks , as we were turning away from each other as Barnsey answered each question as to did he know each and every one of the fictional members of the Cloud 9 . We had to stop in the end because we were unable to speak through the tears . But it was our loss as he had sussed us out and the bullshittery stopped or at least went down to a lesser level . cheers enders